Adam Dunn: Living Legend

Cincinnati Reds outfielder Adam Dunn is the most manful baseball player in the Big Leagues. His legendary home runs are impressive enough to earn him the status of a minor deity. He has Herculean might. His hair is strong and thick, yet soft and smooth. His hair is so soft that former Reds outfielder, Wily Mo Pena is convinced that Dunn's hair is actually the finest silk from the orient. Wily Mo keeps a lock of Dunn's golden hair in his locker at Fenway Park. Wikipedia has chronicled some of Dunn's legends:

In 2004 Dunn hit an estimated 535-foot home run off of the Los Angeles Dodgers' José Lima that cleared the stands at Great American Ball Park, bounced on Mehring Way and finally came to rest on driftwood in the Ohio River. It ranks as one of the longest home runs of the last 30 years and has been rumored to be both the longest recorded shot in Major League Baseball history and, since the Ohio-Kentucky border was defined to be at lower water mark of the Ohio River in 1793, it might also be the first home run to cross a state line in flight. Another Dunn home run struck during the 2006 season hit a car passing by the ballpark on Mehring Way. Reportedly, the owner retrieved the ball and has not come forward.

Adam Dunn does things like this almost every day, but many of his legendary feats go unreported. This is why I am going to post every day that Dunn does something awesome that the sports media fails to recognize. Today is one of those days.

Adam Dunn went 1 for 5 with an RBI and 3 strikeouts today in the Reds' game against the Milwaukee Brewers. A pretty unremarkable day...from a baseball standpoint. What most people don't know is that Dunn's 3 strikeouts had absolutely nothing to do with the pitching. When Adam Dunn was in the dugout, he developed an intense rivalry with a bumble bee who had attempted to sting him. When the bee saw Dunn reaching for his bat, it flew out of the dugout and hovered around the on-deck circle and began to taunt Dunn. This infuriated Dunn. He couldn't wait to step into the batter's box and get his revenge.

The first time Dunn went to the plate to kill the bee, he swung at his enemy with total disregard for the pitcher who struck him out on three pitches. Dunn failed to kill the bee on his first attempt and on his second attempt as well. Enter round three. Dunn stepped into the batter's box and looked into the eyes of the villainous bee for the third time in five innings. Dunn took two swings that grazed the bee and left it hobbled. The bee had lost its quickness and was dazed. While the bee hovered in Dunn's strike zone, he uncorked a third and final swing that launched the bee into orbit. As Dunn admired his amazing swing, the umpire rang him up, strike three. Dunn simply smiled and said "You have no idea. He then sauntered over to the dugout and drank the rest of his Beer-flavored Gatorade. Dunn may have struck out three times to kill that bee, but it was worth it. He settled the score.