I Did It! I Fucking Did It!

You wanna know what I had for lunch today? Fuck, of course you do. I was pretty hungry so I went to the fridge to see what kind of food I had to eat. The only thing that really tickled my balls was some leftover hot wings that I had from lunch yesterday. I would have just heated up the wings but I only had five wings, which is hardly enough to satisfy my manful hunger. I was kind of discouraged, but I couldn't quit. Did the caveman get discouraged when he discovered fire and didn't know how to handle it? Fuck no he didn't. He tamed the flames and he paved the way for me to cook, so I fucking cooked my ass off.

I grabbed the wings and peeled off all the meat. I grabbed four eggs out of the fridge and 2 slices of American cheese. That's right AMERICAN CHEESE. I wasn't about to use some dainty French goat cheese. Fuck that. I was making an omelet. A Buffalo Wing and cheese omelet.

Here's how it went down:

4 Eggs
Garlic Powder
Black Pepper
5 Buffalo Wings
Red Rooster Hot Sauce
2 Slices of American Cheese

It was tremendous. It was one of the greatest omelets in the history of Mandom. You don't believe me? I have photo evidence.

That's a big fuckin' omelet. It was heavier than Star Jones before the gastric bypass surgery. I needed a fucking forklift to flip that omelet in the pan and a crane to get it onto my plate. As you can see I had a beer (High Life) with my masterpiece. I also had some Blue Cheese with it because you gotta eat hot wings with some blue cheese. This omelet had everything. Good mix of flavors, well cooked, and fine texture. Here's a look at the inside of the omelet.

Pretty sexy huh. You know I polished it off as well. It was a lot of food, but I was pretty hungry because I took a big ass dump like an hour before I started cooking. Here's the aftermath of the delicious work of art.

Very impressive, I know. All in a day's work for a man like me.